roartonrisen

AU

Quite honestly, for about three months, Kieren just sort of figured his cat's been getting really fat. It's not like he should know better, because it's not like he'd ever had an appreciation for the animal arts when he'd been alive. So when someone had given Kieren a look like he's an idiot and commented that the cat's just pregnant, he doesn't think it should be his fault he hadn't noticed.

He hadn't even noticed himself coming back to life. How is he supposed to notice a cat?

He can notice, though, that the cat seems to be in distress and a quick check on the internet says that this is around the time they go into labour. Still, he's not doing this on his own. A touch panicked, Kieren fumbles around the bungalow for his things and fetches towels and an actual dropcloth, texting Sirius absently as he wanders, running a hand through his hair until it's wild.

Does he call a vet? Does he get a house call? Do those things still happen?

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Sirius's back pocket vibrates.

It's not an unusual sensation. In the past several months, he's gradually learned to carry the small Muggle contraption on his person at all times and has even learned how to use it a bit if only because Kieren insists upon it. It's not his favourite means of communication, but he'll admit it has its uses from time to time.

Such as when Kieren is clearly in a panic.

He's only gone to the store to stock up a bit on milk and butter and the like and he doesn't think very much of taking it all with him when he apparates straight into Kieren's front room just in time to see Kieren hauling a large, paint-stained cloth. "Is that-- This isn't a murder, is it?"

His eyes bug out in alarm at the thought that this might turn into a murder scene if he doesn't know what he's doing. He doesn't want to think of his cat ending up murdered because he doesn't know how to take care of her. "Ginger's having her babies," he says, a touch frantic because he doesn't know how to do this. "Have you ever given birth to kittens before?"

It seems such an utterly preposterous question that at first Sirius can only stare, dumbfounded.

Then he lets out what can only be described as a squawk. "Don't they just... exist?" he says, knowing full well that that isn't how it works at all. He'd been there at Harry's birth, after all. Not in the room, of course, but around, close enough to hear Lily's wails of pain.

Merlin, but he hopes cat birth is at least slightly less noisy than all that. "Should we just take her to hospital? Cat hospital? I've not learned any healing spells for cats!"

Kieren's face contorts up in disbelief, shaking his head because he honestly doesn't know if Sirius is being, well, serious. "They have to be born," he gets out, strained and shaking his head. He settles on the ground with warm water and a bowl and towels and he's searched online for answers, but didn't come up for much.

"I don't think you go to the cat hospital for a birth. Do you? Thank god neither of us are ever going to have an actual baby," he scoffs.

"I've been around a human birth," Sirius protests, though he really doesn't disagree that he'd be terrible if such a thing were to actually occur where he'd be needed to see it. Much less participate.

Still hovering, he frowns down at all the things Kieren has gathered and asks, "What's the water for? Do we need tools at all? Can I just magic them out, do you think? Just... ease the way a bit?"

Kieren isn't really sure he's the sort of person who wants kids, but maybe that's just being a zombie for years talking, stunting his life and his brain. "I don't know, the internet said I should have some warm water on hand? Maybe it's to sort of clean things up after or to wash off the kittens..." He trails off, shaking his head. "If you magic them out, what if they're ... wrong?" he ekes out.

"How might they be wrong?" Sirius replies, affronted at the mere thought. "I wouldn't hurt them!" At least not intentionally, of course.

With a huff, he drops to his knees then, eyeing the towel and the poor cat sprawled out before them, looking more than a bit... lumpy. "What else did your internet tell you?" he asks because that's still not something he's come to fully grasp, not even with Kieren's considerable help.

"Inside ... out?" he ekes out, not entirely sure what he means about wrong, just knowing that he has images of bloody, damaged kittens that he doesn't entirely know what to do with. One thing he hasn't missed about being human is this prickling anxiety trickling over him, cheeks flushed dotted pink with worry.

He kneels down beside Sirius, shoulder to shoulder, flush skin pressed to him. "I didn't get further than what I needed," he confesses.

"Inside-out?" Sirius balks, partially genuinely offended though most of it is for show. "Exactly what sort of wizard do you take me for?"

Kieren's knelt beside him now, towel and warm water at the ready and Sirius reaches a shaky hand forward to lightly pet poor Ginger, trying his best to soothe though it seems to have not much of an effect. "I suppose we don't much encourage her to breathe or push," he says, frowning. "Do we just wait for them to pop out one by one?"

Kieren leans forward to tenderly rub Ginger's ears, rubbing his thumb into the little divot as he wishes he could make this easier for her. Being human again means remembering all the little things, like how much pain can sting. He can't even imagine what the poor thing is going through. "Maybe we can try and sort of push for her? Just to help them out?"

"Or will that hurt them?"

"How am I to know?" Sirius replies with a small, nearly hysterical little laugh. "I only know pain as a dog, not a cat. And certainly not a pregnant cat."

Little Ginger lets out another low, rather pained-sounding yowl then, as though in response and Sirius cringes, his heart going out to her. "I've... I've a feeling we don't do a thing," he says then. "Kittens are born every day without human intervention, are they not? Perhaps we just sit and wait?"

"That doesn't feel very helpful," Kieren admits, sinking back onto his haunches as he stares at his poor cat, who's having one difficult time by the looks of her. He still strokes her hair and gives Sirius a bemused little quirked smile, unable to help himself. "If you find yourself suddenly a pregnant dog, I'm gonna be upset," he informs him, trying to ignore the little pained sounds coming from Ginger.

Edited 2016-06-01 23:10 (UTC)

"You'll be upset?" Sirius says with another sharp laugh.

Poor Ginger really seems to be having a bad go of things, still yowling faintly even as Kieren lightly brushes his fingers over her fur.

"Do we need to... adjust her?" he asks, grimacing slightly as he cocks his head. "Like, ehm. Spread her legs or any of that? Or do they just slide out?"

"Well, we never know when this city might decide to play with you," Kieren jokes, settling onto his arse and leaning his body warmth into Sirius as he tries to gently nudge Ginger into a better position, on her side. "D'you think they can just sort of come out, like you said, if we put her like this?"

It's not unheard of, Sirius knows. He's both seen it firsthand and heard more than a few tales, but the idea of suddenly losing his penis, even if for only a short while, is not a little bit horrifying.

Sirius shifts as Kieren nestles in closer, warm against his side in a way that, even now, Sirius finds himself delighting in. He leans into it gently as he curls arm around Kieren's waist, hand resting on his hip. "I think gravity will help out in the long run," he says. "And biological necessity. I suppose can move them one by one so there's room."

This is a very inconvenient time for his body to be sitting up and taking awareness of how close he and Sirius are. He lets out a happy exhalation and leans forward to rub at Ginger's ears, then glancing up at Sirius. "What're we going to do with all the kittens? Do we just give them away? Or could we sell them?"

Kieren leans forward to rub at poor Ginger's ears, Sirius's gaze catching on the soft hairs at the base of his neck before he reaches out to touch, grinning faintly.

"Haven't a clue," he answers honestly. "How much would we even sell them for? Could we just drop them off at someone's doorstep?"

"Like an abandoned baby?" Kieren replies, mock-horrified as he leans back into the touch to his neck, an adoring look thrown over his shoulder as he comes up with a thought of his own. "What would you say if I wanted to keep them?" he asks, not really sure he wants to do that, but wanting to see how Sirius will react to the notion of a home with three times as many cats, at least.

It's possible Sirius is misinformed, but he feels a kitten is a good deal less work than a baby, but here merely smirks, still lightly petting Kieren's nape before he suddenly stills.

"All of them? Do we even know how many there might be? Haven't I told you before -- I'm really much more of a dog person."

"Teasing," is all Kieren says, with an amused quirk of his lips. Though, the image of Sirius as Padfoot surrounded by kittens does make his heart melt, so maybe before they give them all away, they should do that at least once. Long enough for him to get a picture, at least. "I wouldn't mind keeping one, see if you can get along when you're outnumbered."

Kieren's more a cat than a dog, really. He's lanky and a touch clumsy grace and far more standoffish than a friendly dog would ever be.

"I'm outnumbered now with you and Ginger ganging up on me," Sirius argues, though his tone is nothing but fond as he slides his hand down Kieren's bag and gives his shirt a light, playful tug.

Little Ginger lets out another noise then, one that seems distinctly distressed and Sirius's eyes fall wide as he looks down. "Oh, maybe that one," he says, watching in slight horror as a small little thing slides right out poor Ginger's bum area.

Kieren stares in horror at what's happening right now, instantly deciding if Sirius ever does magically get impregnated as a dog, he's not going anywhere near him if there's this slime and mucus involved. "I hope it didn't look like this when I warmed up," he says, even though he knows that's not the case, seeing as he had sort of just...blinked finally and everything had restarted.

"I've a feeling your rebirth was much less... slimey," Sirius says, glancing down at the towel in Kieren's hands. "Do we wash him? Her?"

Poor Ginger is still making sad, pained little noises and seems to be breathing a little faster than normal and Sirius leans forward, very gingerly picking up the very, very small, not quite wiggling little mass of goo.

Kieren can't help his smirk. "Certain parts afterwards definitely had their fair share of sticky substances," he points out, as if Sirius wouldn't remember despite having been a participant in those events. He smiles with heart-melting fondness when Sirius picks up the little thing, handing over the towel. "Here, you can wash her off and I'll try and keep Ginger calm."

Taking the towel from Kieren, Sirius very carefully begins washing the squirmy little thing, wiping goo from behind its tiny ears and off its curvy back. It mews pitfully and Ginger glares up at him, panting at him in such a way that Sirius immediately settles the little ball down near her so that Ginger can nose and lick at it herself.

"What sort of sticky substances?" he asks, glancing quickly over at Kieren once more. "Did you need someone to lick you clean at the time?"

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